When a parent refuses to admit that they need help and can no longer live alone, many families struggle to make them accept this fact. At times, certain family members side with the parent, making things harder. What can a family do when a loved one needs to transition to assisted living but doesn’t want to?
Discuss the Level of Care Needed
Before arriving at the conclusion that the loved one must move to a senior living community, determine the level of care they need. A professional assessment is a great way to assess their needs, as a neutral third party isn’t emotionally involved.
In addition, speak to the parent’s medical team. They know what medical challenges the parent faces, what prescriptions they take, and what they have seen during exams. They can provide their opinion as to the best living arrangement for the parent.
An elder care expert may also be called to visit the parent’s home. The more outside opinions that are gathered, the easier it becomes to determine the best living arrangement for the parent at the current time.
If family members cannot reach an agreement on where the parent should live, it might be time to take a step back. Tell them a break is needed and they will need to help the parent with tasks. There are several benefits to taking this approach.
The parent won’t feel as if they are being pressured to do something they don’t want to. They regain a sense of control, which they might feel they have lost during discussions about where they should live. In addition, other family members may get a better understanding of the challenges the parent faces and why an assisted living community in Stockton, CA is the best solution.
Another reason a parent may put off moving to memory care communities is they worry about the financial aspects of doing so. They don’t want their children to be stuck with an expensive bill each month, and they may worry that they don’t have the funds for this type of care for long.
To ease the burden on the parent and children, the family should sit down with staff members at several communities providing care for seniors. Learn about any programs that are offered to help ease the financial aspect of this move. Many families discover there are resources they were unaware of that will help pay for this care.
Work Within the Law
When the parent is putting themselves in danger by remaining in their home, it’s time to seek legal advice. An attorney that handles elder care matters can advise a person on what steps to take in this situation, particularly when other family members refuse to accept that the parent is at risk.
In addition, a geriatric social worker can be of help in guiding a person through this challenge. At times, a family member will need to seek guardianship over the parent, which may upset the parent. However, it is better to have them alive and upset than the alternative. This may become necessary when the parent needs memory care, as their cognitive function is declining.
At times, a parent or family member might feel as if the person suggesting this type of living arrangement is uncaring. In this situation, it is best to sit down and discuss everyone’s feelings on the subject. One family member might push for a senior community because they fear the loved one will fall and nobody will be around to help, for example. This needs to be shared with everyone.
By doing so, families can see that everyone has their own concerns. They can then talk rationally about these concerns and how best to resolve them. The parent no longer feels as if they are the problem and may be more willing to make this move to give their loved ones peace of mind.
However, the parent may also be anxious about making this move. Recognize this and get them help if needed. The parent may not recognize this is what they are feeling, and the family must step up in this situation.
If a parent needs additional help, there are many options open to families. Consider all when determining which is right for the individual. Assisted living arrangements are ideal for many senior adults, but not all. It’s a matter of finding a solution that works for the parent and all family members. When this is the case, the transition is much easier.
About Summerfield of Stockton:
Summerfield of Stockton offers a variety of living arrangements, as we recognize senior adults have different needs. In addition to memory care options, we open our community to those in need of short-term living arrangements. Regardless of how long a person stays with us, they become part of our family and are treated with love and respect.